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9 What would you do differently if you knew no one would judge you? (03/07/2023)

Initially, I might speak more often with almost no filter because after all nobody would care about what I said or what I did. I would call people out immediately if they did something wrong. People would know what I was thinking or how I was feeling because I would express immediately. It's like when you are drunk, and when you think of something, it immediately comes out of your mouth raw.

From pure honesty, I will transition to stupidity. If I had an idea regardless of how bad or dumb it was, I would enact it almost immediately whether it was doing pushups on the floor, stuffing my mouth with food right off the grocery shelves, stealing money from the bank, swimming in the school fountain, drawing stupid cartoon emojis everywhere, and knocking into every house to see what each person's room and day-to-day looks like.

From stupidity, I might transition to homicidal. A part of me is always curious what's it like to hurt and even kill living things. I feel little to no remorse when I squash bugs from houseflies to spiders. Will I feel the same way if I tortured and killed a rat? What about a cat, dog, or a human being? I don't know. How is somebody supposed to know if they are capable of hurting and killing someone until they have done it?

This reminds me of the scene from the Drama Series, “Chernobyl”.

“I thought, well, that’s it Macho, you put a bullet in someone, you’re not you anymore, you’ll never be you again but then you wake up the next morning, and you’re still you and you realize that was you all along. You just didn’t know.”