119

119. When was the last time someone made a negative comment about your personality? Who was it and what did they say? (06/12/2023)

It was during work today. One of my coworkers, Paez, showed up. We had a customer knock at our office. I responded with "yeh" because I am very casual in conversations. He said, "you are weird". I responded, "yeah, I know. Who else would be?". Almost everyone in my platoon thinks I am weird because I do weird things in their defense. I do pushups on the office floor, I have different taste in movies and music, and I have a very different viewpoint in most things. It does hurt knowing that I am not accepted by others. At times I also feel lonely. This is the price I have to pay for being brutally honest and open about who I am. I have to live my own truth and face disapproval and criticism from others in exchange for my freedom. That may be the main reason for why I miss home. When I am with my close friends, I feel like I belong without feeling caged.

Still, I often find myself putting on a filter on my words and my acts. I do wish at times that everyone accepted me, but that is a fantasy. At the end of the day, it is best to be around people who can accept me for who I am. I still need friends at the end of the day.