Twelve (i have run out of numeral ideas)
12. Greeting: Write a story or poem that starts with the word “hello” or another greeting. (02/26/2023)
I said “Hello, my name is BG, what’s yours?”.
It was the first general meeting of the Asian American Association (AAA) in my college. Being away from home for the first time and living on my own was terrifying and exciting simultaneously. On one hand, I felt more free to go anywhere and do what I want. On the other hand, I felt really lonely because all my family and close friends were back home in Los Angeles while I was up north in Berkeley with nobody I knew. I went to my classes but I was too scared to form new connections so I never sat next to anyone. While walking back to my dorms, some random college dude with a heavy California bro accent handed me a flyer for AAA saying I should check them out. I said “Sure” as to keep walking and not cause any arguments with him.
After I got back to my room, I left the flyer on top of my desk to check it out some other time. Having nobody to hang out with left me miserable as I spent most of my free time walking outside at night, listening to music in my EarPods, and wondering why I suck at making friends. Two weeks of classes went by before I finally gave the AAA club a try. Luckily for me, their first general meeting was two nights away for new members.
The science lecture hall was full of Asian students chatting with each other as they waited for the meeting to start. My social anxiety immediately kicked in. Deep down I started wondering, “What if they think that I am weird? Am I outgoing enough for them? Do they even consider me to be Asian as my country (Nepal) is super small and most people don’t know it exists?. My first instinct was to head for the back row chair where nobody was sitting. As I started walking up, a part of me scolded myself: “You came here to make new friends, if you go in the back, everyone will notice the coward you are”. I turned halfway and looked around for people to sit next to. There were a group of guys and girls making jokes and laughing. I did not feel confident enough to suddenly sit right next to them. During my search, I found some dude sitting in the middle row alone scrolling through Instagram. I had found my target, somebody as antisocial as I was. So I made my way towards him, and my heart beat kept rising with each step I made. I started wondering, “What if he told me to fuck off in front of everyone, I will never recover from that public embarrassment. Right as I got near him, I slowly sat down on the chair to his right.
I waved my right hand slightly over his phone to catch his attention. I said: “Hello, my name is BG, what’s yours?” with a wide smile and my right hand open for a handshake. The moment he looked up and caught my eyes, his eyes were startled for a split second. He was shocked that some random stranger actually sat next to him and said hello. He looked down at my hand and in embarrassment shook my hand with slightly more speed and force than a normal handshake. With some nervousness and a heavy Chinese accent, he replied, “Hi my name is Kaiyuan, but you can call me Jackie”.
That is the story of how I made my first friend at UC Berkeley. I made more friends after that at the club and through my study groups but I will never forget my first friend. The first one is always the hardest and the easiest one to procrastinate on whether its the first time making a friend in a new area, looking for a job, asking somebody out, opening up your own website, traveling to a different country. However, the first one is also the most rewarding and memorable.
