115+116
115. When we look back on this time in the future, what’ll we remember most? (06/09/2023)
Covid.
Throughout most of human history, we have had wars, mass genocides, and a lot of fucked up things. We also had numerous technological advancements whether it was the discovery of gravity, discovery of America, or creation of the steam engine. The world was constantly moving forward in time, but during Covid, it felt like time had stopped for about 2 years. Everyone was stuck in their homes trying to not get covid. I was studying my college classes and working part-time in my own room. I could only see my classmates, coworkers, and friends through a computer screen. It felt like one long dream. By the time Covid restrictions were over, 2 years felt like one month.
This generation would definitely remember Covid but I don't know about future generations. They may have world war 3 or some massive human advancement like living on Mars or the Moon. If somebody manages to cure cancer or find a way to make humans live forever, then that might be the most memorable. It will be game changing. Why worry about heaven or hell when you can just live forever? People may not want to reproduce anymore and just want to relax for their entire lives because they have all the time in the world.
As for me, I will remember my time in 7th grade and immigrating to America as my most memorable memory.
116. What’s one of the proudest moments of your life so far? Why were you proud? (06/09/2023)
It was the day I broke my parents' hearts.
For some context, me and my coworkers have been watching a TLC reality drama show called "I Love a Mama's Boy". It's a show about long-term couples who have a relationship problem. The male is too attached to his mother at the detriment of his girlfriend/fiancé/wife. Usually, the mother and the female partner are constantly fighting against each other because one does not like the other. Some relationships range from being extremely flirty/sexual with his mom while others have trouble keeping healthy boundaries with their moms. The main issue is that the mom has too large of a presence in the couple's relationship. The guy likes that which is why they are called a Mama's boy.
I was set up to be a Mama's boy. In the Nepali culture I come from, family is very tight-knit. If you are a guy, you live with your parents till the end. Even after you get a job, get married, and have kids, your family moves in to your parents' home. That's what my parents had in mind for me. I believe that if I had lived most of my childhood with them being around, I might have become a Mama's boy. Even though I wanted to be an adult and move out, I would have avoided it to not upset my parents. I might have continued studying pre-med and became a doctor to make my parents proud. I might have gone to Nepal with them to get an arranged marriage because I had zero social and dating skills. My mom would have picked the bride and me and my dad would have just gone with it. Since they constantly ask me for grandkids, I would have gotten them two kids just to make them happy. That would have been my fate.
However, my parents were almost always at work whether it was in a different country or late nights in the apartment. I got used to being on my own, warding off the loneliness with video games, movies, and long walks outside. By the time, we all immigrated to the US together, I had zero desire to live with my parents in the future.
As time went on, our different cultures and viewpoints often blew up into arguments and hour long lectures at the lunch table. They were disappointed and ashamed of me and I felt like a prisoner living with them. The only solution was that I lived on my own. Both my mom and dad cried the night I told them that. They were heartbroken and I felt like a monster for hurting them but it had to be done. There was no happy future in which we lived under the same roof. I was too much of an American for them, and they were too Nepali for me.
