17

17 What’s something you wish more people knew? (03/15/2023)

I wish people knew that I would always love to have a deep down conversation with anybody whether they are a friend or stranger. I love listening to people tell me about their stories whether its about how they grew up, struggles they went through, and their thoughts about the future no matter how optimistic or cynical.
The No.1 desire of each human being is to understand and to feel understood. When we don't have that, we can often feel lonely even if we are in a party full of people we know.
I hate having a filter on whenever I speak with others. I want to be fully honest with others and I want others to do the same to me. Whenever I am doing small talk, it feels exhausting because I have to constantly come up with "safe topics" to keep the conversation going. I hate that.
However, I still continue with the small talk because I am scared of being viewed as weird. There is a part of me inside that restrains myself whenever I try to ask a question or try to open up about myself. So I often just stand in silence listening to others' small talk or I often stutter and try my best to entertain others' who are getting bored of my topics. My fear of rejection has bound me to a life of dishonesty and dissatisfaction.